Shelving that for now

"… Setting everything else aside, stealing is wrong."

That's what I said. I'll just conveniently ignore the fact that I was about to steal something myself.

"Indeed. However, there are unavoidable circumstances at play."

"Sir."

"Hermes. Gowei. It's fine. Stand down."

At those words, the large bodyguard smoothly stepped back. Very obedient, I see.

The man addressed as "sir," who had a strangely commanding presence, began speaking to me.

"… Are you familiar with Alchemia?"

"Hm? Ah, yes. I am."

"It was destroyed. For incurring divine wrath."

Oh, yeah. I know that too. Actually, I'm the one who did it.

"And God sent an Apostle to this world. The report came from Véraldo."

"… Hm?"

"The former lord's wife, Lady Mariabel, succeeded in making contact."

Oh, yeah… Why does this sound awfully familiar?

"We've confirmed evidence as well. The pirate Gomez. The disappearance of his base along with the Divine Artifact 'Poseidon.' The site of his former base was cleanly carved out down to the underground. With precision impossible by human hands."

"O-oh."

Oh, yeah. No doubt about it, this is about me.

"And the Apostle apparently said this: Offer up the Divine Artifacts, or else in ten years, this world shall perish."

"Hold on a second?"

The nuance is slightly different!! I accidentally let my real self slip out a bit!

Ahh, come to think of it, Granny Maria did say she'd report this to her superiors. So that's what this is.

Hm? Then maybe this guy is some bigshot in the government… is that it?

"Ahem! … Ah, who art thou? Surely not merely the employer of a thief?"

"I'd like to ask you the same. Is the guard who was stationed outside still alive?"

"That one is safe. Not a scratch, and I guarantee their life."

"Oh? So Konoe was subdued without a sound, and unharmed at that. A terrifying master of skill…"

I didn't actually take them down, though. I completely ignored them when I entered this room.

Or rather, I didn't even notice they were there.

"Then allow me to introduce myself. I am King Paverkant the Third. King of the Paverkant Kingdom."

He's a king! Whoa, he's a king!! No wonder he's so full of dignity!

Wait, so does that mean those guards are part of the Royal Guard?

Whoa, that's amazing. They're hardcore government officials. Super elites!!

"… There appears to have been a slight misunderstanding."

"Misunderstanding?"

"Ah, no, just talking to myself."

The king opened his mouth to continue speaking.

"Well, I suppose it's hard to believe when you're told something like this so suddenly… but it is the truth."

"Y-yes! I shall believe this tale completely. Now then, farewell."

"Hm? Ah, I wasn't finished talking—"

I hurriedly left the scene as if fleeing.

No, I actually was fleeing.

I fled back to my base.

The moment I returned to my room, I dove onto the bed, lay face-down, and kicked my feet in the air.

—This is all my fault!!

I'm the reason the Divine Artifact was targeted, and I'm also the one who stopped it!

What a self-made crisis!! I was just a clueless clown being strung along the whole time!?

How embarrassing! I was too embarrassed to stay there any longer!

Also, the Goddess is definitely holding her sides laughing at this, right!?

I know you are, dammit!!

Gaaaah, I can't explain this to Mie-chan…!

… I need to write a letter of complaint to Granny Maria later. Geez!

Oh, crap. I forgot to retrieve the fake "Breaching Wall Hammer."

… …

… …

… I don't care! I don't care anymore!! I'm going to sleep!!!!