I Founded a Religion

(Previously on LDM: Kehma made some unimportant decision.)

Having decided to build a church for Beddhism, I set aside various issues and got started on construction. Call it escaping from reality if you will.

… I was thinking of building something huge, but now that I think about it, I don't have that much land.

Well, this is the first church, so something modest should be fine. I can plan for building a huge one in the future; for now, let me just make a rough blueprint.

I prepared paper and pens and set to work in my office.

First, the exterior. Personally, when I think of churches, I imagine white walls with a blue roof. That should work for the building.

For materials… the white would be plaster? Lime from shells and such. The blue… what would blue roofing even be made of? Copper? Verdigris? Hmm, I'll just make something and paint it.

I'd also like windows that let warm light in. Glass windows are precious commodities in this world, but I can easily process potion bottles using [Create Golem], so I can add plenty of them.

That's the exterior sorted, so next is the interior.

Seating where people can sit side by side and pray toward the sacred object… Right, let's add desks so they can doze off at them.

After all, sleeping is praying in Beddhism. There's something mysteriously sleep-inducing about desks. Maybe I should add partitions so people don't have to worry about whoever's next to them.

And for the sacred object, it has to be a futon… no, wait. Maybe I could hang a 5-yen coin on a string and make a pendulum? In the "you're getting sleepy" sense.

Actually, using a 5-yen coin as our symbol might be good, like how Christianity uses a cross. It's convenient to use.

… But having an actual 5-yen coin might be weird, so I'll make it a coin with a hole in it. That way you could thread a string through it and wear it as a pendant.

So the sacred object will be based on a 5-yen pendulum, then… Like a pendulum clock? Well, whatever, it's fine.

Next I'll make a lectern… droning on with tediously long talks to make people sleepy sounds good too.

Right, while I'm at it, I should keep some difficult books around that'll put you right to sleep. The only book I know of in this world is [Introduction to Dungeonology], but maybe I can have Dyne Trading Company procure some random books. I have a decent amount of money.

"Yeah, this looks pretty good."

I looked over the rough blueprint again.

…

It looks like a classroom. If I replaced the sacred object with a blackboard, it would be perfect.

Right, it's like a temple school sort of thing? I guess it could be used for that too… yeah.

Oh right. Should I make confessionals too? Well, I'll make those normally…

Just as I finished writing everything down, there was a knock on the door.

"Kehma? I heard from Niku, but what's this about you making a church?"

"Oh, Rokuko? Come on in."

"Pardon the intrusion… So, you're making a church? Are you going to worship Haku-neesama or something?"

"No, I'm making a church for Beddhism."

"Beddhism?"

Rokuko tilted her head… Come to think of it, I never told her about it.

"I've never heard of it. Is it a religion from where you came from, Kehma?"

"I created it. Or rather, I guess I'm about to create it? So it makes sense that you wouldn't know about it."

"Well, of course I wouldn't know then… But, can you just create a religion?"

"There's the White Goddess Faith that treats Haku-san as a god, so there shouldn't be any problem with me creating one."

"Shouldn't… there?"

Yep, no problem. Just think of it as a new religion.

"What kind of doctrine does it have?"

"It's an extremely peaceful religion that prioritizes safety, tranquility, and comfortable sleep above all else. Prayer is sleeping. It's something simple you can do every day, right?"

"Right. As long as it's not like sixteen hours a day."

"Afternoon naps and regular sleep are perfectly fine, yes."

… I think sixteen hours would be easy enough though…

Anyway, I made a note: Prayer is sleeping.

"And here's the groundbreaking part: Beddhism can be followed as a [Sub-Religion]."

"Sub-religion…? What's that?"

"Say your main faith is the Light God, Dark God, or Evil God. Beddhism acknowledges that. It acknowledges it, and on top of that, you can also follow Beddhism on the side. That's what it means."

In game terms, think of it like a sub-job. Like having Warrior as your main and Priest as your sub. Same thing with having White Goddess Faith as your main and Beddhism as your sub. Of course, having Beddhism as your main is fine too.

Pray to your main god for happiness, and follow Beddhism for tranquility. Take the best of both worlds.

"Is that okay? I've never heard of anything like that."

"There's no problem at all. Think of it as being broad-minded. Won't that attract more people? Right, Rokuko, you can be Believer Number 2!"

"I'll reserve Number 695, so do your best gathering followers, okay?"

"O-Okay."

That's quite a lot… I guess I'll include Niku and Ichika in the roster.

"Isn't there, you know, some religious story or tale?"

"Hmm? Right… I'll make something up. A story that earnestly preaches the importance of sleep… Oh, and mosquitoes are the enemy. Let's treat them as devils."

The great devil Mosquito, invisible yet making its presence absolutely known, disturbing sleep with its buzzing wings and itchy bites. Repel them with the Holy Sword Katori Senko…!

Oh, speaking of holy swords. Sleepsword Siesta shall be the divine blade that spreads the salvation of sleep. Memo, memo.

"By the way, would someone like me who doesn't need sleep be treated as a heretic?"

"Not needing sleep doesn't matter. Rather, as long as you can take rest, you qualify as a Beddhist even if you don't need sleep."

"How loose."

"Futons embrace all with their gentle existence… they make no distinction between good and evil, this is truly equal love. A futon is like a mother… But mosquitoes, you're not welcome. At least stop flying around."

Yeah, I'll write the scriptures along those lines. Let me make more notes. Other fitting phrases…

Lack of sleep is the enemy of beautiful skin… that appeals to women.

You can't fight without rest. Rest in order to fight… warriors need rest too.

Don't rush, don't rush, take a rest, take a rest… that should attract clergy.

Sleep properly so you don't ruin your health… good for workers.

Slow thinking is no different from sleeping… wait, that's not quite right.

"Futons are all, all is futons…"

"Kehma, are you sleep-deprived? Is your head okay?"

"I'm fine, no problem."

Now I just need to actually build the church and gain followers. Once I have more followers, I can openly sleep twice a day in the name of prayer… I can do it! Not that I don't already do that!

If everyone goes back to sleep after waking up, no one can complain about me doing it!

If I make it so no one can say anything about me taking naps, or rather, so that napping is praiseworthy, then I win! Fuhahaha!

"Right, how about this for adventurers: 'Join now and receive a mini azuki pillow that doubles as emergency rations!'?"

"Ichika would like that."

Well, since they're edible, mites and such will eventually infest them, so they'd only last about half a year.

Would [Purify] make them last longer?

 

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—In the beginning, there was the world.

Living creatures were born into the world. And with them, rest was also born.

Rest is salvation, and it is tranquility.

All beings have an equal right to rest.

And what aids that rest above all else is the Futon.

The Futon is love, and the Futon is the symbol of peace.

The Futon makes no distinction between good and evil, and regardless of which god one worships, it embraces all life.

Therefore, all beings are children of the Futon. The Futon is simply a gentle mother watching over them.

Seek better rest. Comfortable sleep. That is the doctrine of Beddhism.

(Excerpt from Beddhism Scriptures, Chapter 1 Verse 1: "The Futon of Tranquility")